John Gottman on Family Relationships’ Stability

John Gottman has devoted most of his works to studying family relationships’ stability. He describes the essential criteria of an apocalypse in relationships that bring a married couple close to divorce. These are criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. The psychologist believes that these phenomena have to be detected in relationships unless the critical point is reached. Criticism and contempt should be replaced by the sincere complaint that describes the true feelings of a partner who feels uncomfortable because of the beloved person’s behavior. Defensiveness is to be eliminated, as it gives rise to the positions of a winner and a loser; both of them can lead to separation. Stonewalling can be defeated by an agreement to discuss essential issues only when the partners feel mental readiness. If one feels uncomfortable, the conversation should be postponed. All the criteria mentioned above are to be detected and fixed. The most effective strategy for resolving critical situations is sincere but sedate discussions.

The choice of a career is the thing that significantly influences all spheres in life, including family relationships. I am convinced that it is impossible to be a successful professional without having balanced relationships. Thus, building a proper career strategy is quite vital for personal happiness. I have determined my occupation relatively early, and now I believe that all subjects, programs, and research works covered during my studying process will contribute to my professional fulfillment. I know that education does not end on the last day at college or university for a good specialist. I will continue exploring all the issues about which I do not feel quite confident. Attending additional courses will undoubtedly become an essential part of my life. Developing myself as a specialist, I will be progressing as a personality, becoming more balanced, understanding, and caring. I am sure it will improve my relationships with my family members.

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PsychologyWriting. (2024) 'John Gottman on Family Relationships’ Stability'. 19 January.

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PsychologyWriting. 2024. "John Gottman on Family Relationships’ Stability." January 19, 2024. https://psychologywriting.com/john-gottman-on-family-relationships-stability/.

1. PsychologyWriting. "John Gottman on Family Relationships’ Stability." January 19, 2024. https://psychologywriting.com/john-gottman-on-family-relationships-stability/.


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PsychologyWriting. "John Gottman on Family Relationships’ Stability." January 19, 2024. https://psychologywriting.com/john-gottman-on-family-relationships-stability/.